Great news for careerists at Westminster with the news that Conservative MP’s caught lying about civil service conspiracy plots to undermine Brexit, will now be automatically added to this year’s honours list.
”It’s especially good news for Steve Baker MP and outdated f*ckwittery engine Jacob Rees-mogg MP,” our parliamentary correspondent says.
”Allegedly, and it’s not confirmed, the evidence is only circumstancial and damning, the two cooked up a plan to rubbish civil service economic forecasts produced by the Westminster comedy club, DExEU, for use in planning the United Kingdom’s destruction.
After the destruction we will rebuild as a tax haven. It’s nice.”
While all of this is pure speculation, it’s believed the two honest brokers decide to beat the living hell out of the truth in order to make it fit their ideological purposes.
”If it was a con-spiracy to smear the civil service by abuse of parliamentary privilege, it was pretty bloody hamfisted, cynical and pathetic,” our correspondent adds,
“imagine being that devoid of integrity and lacking that much respect for democracy and the position of a people’s representative?
Old school public school bully mentally. Pick on the ones who can’t fight back. What a lark! And serve your own ends in the process. Nice work if you can get it, like being an MP and all the expenses and privilege.”
Asked for comment on what sanctions will be taken against the devious, truth fighting duo, the terrified and clueless woman who thinks she is the prime minister issued the following statement,
“On the 23rd of June 2016 the British people voted to ensure all Conservative Party MP’s caught lying in parliament to be automatically included on that year’s honours list.”
The British people have spoken, now let them be quiet.