British prime minister Field (of wheat) Marshall Theresa May is expected to join a conference call later this morning with Donald Trump, Vladimir Putin and Rupert Murdoch to discuss the EU’s latest offer of October 25th as the new Brexit date.
While accepting the new date would mean participating in the EP elections, it’s felt the U.K. can get around this unpalatable democratic experience by adopting leader of the opposition Jeremy Corbyn’s overall Brexit strategy of being present, but not involved, and then claiming to have forgotten the experience altogether later. Plausible deniability is of course expected to reap a whirlwind for Labour at any future election.
”The Russians will presumably be especially tickled over the October date,” our political strategist Field (of scorn) Marshall Titan Searchlight muses, “being the anniversary of the charge of the light brigade. Trump will of course say da to whatever his payday loan master agrees to and Murdoch will love an additional six months of printing traitors and betrayal in big font size to contribute to the mature public discussion in the U.K. over Brexit.”
The date suggests the EU will establish a new theme of picking anniversaries of British disasters for any further Brexit extensions.
”Sneaking through two weeks was very clever,” an anonymous cabinet minister acknowledged, “we were too busy working out what mix of blackmail and bribery to offer MPs to back May’s last charge of the Withdrawal Agreement. Now we’ve got a fortnight of biting our necks before retreating again.”
What Field (of wheat) Marshall May will think of the extension offer is not known as no one has bothered to find out.