LCD Views believe it is important that everyone understands the motivations of the filthy rich Brexiters quitting the UK personally, or moving their businesses out, setting up overseas subs etc, before Brexit are only doing it out of a driving humanitarian feeling that is irresistible.
“I can’t help it,” Mr Pig Trough told us, “when I think of all those people who are needlessly suffering through no mistake of their own, but an unfortunate combination of nature, nurture and the accident of birth, I just want to help. By moving assets out of the UK I make myself less of a burden on the state, which can then focus more on the little people. Really focus on them. Work out exactly what is left in their pocket and what to do about it.”
The little people will clearly not be quitting the UK, either assets wise or personally, in great numbers relatively speaking, but be here to ensure there is at least someone to tax once the state starts failing in earnest.
“We want you all to know we are your international champions,” Mr Crap Hoovers said, busily piling another load of jobs and tax revenue into a private jet, “from a secure base overseas in a region with bugger all employment rights and friendly tax rates, I can best pave a way forward for the UK to follow. That’s some plastic patriotism right there. And we all know plastic lasts a long time. So it must be good.”
The news that they are driven by altruism will help many.
“We’ll be sending you pictures of food too,” A Predator confirms, “just so you know what to look for when you’re rioting when the stockpile of spam is exhausted.”
Any advice for how best to share the Brexit dividend about, given you won’t be personally here to help?
“Imagine if the housing market crashes and people can’t afford to keep on with their mortgage? They won’t have a roof over their heads. I’ll buy the roof for them and then they can stay in their home, or one a little smaller some distance away.”
“And just be sure that once the UK is out of the EU then all those new anti-tax dodging initiatives won’t apply to you or me. That way I can keep more of what you earn, by way of privatising the last of the state owned services that you’ll still be paying tax to support, even afterwards. Funny how that works. We’ll be here for you, with our additional passports that are burgundy, well, at least in spirit.”