SEE HOW YOU LIKE IT : A LOCAL SOUTH LONDON GREEN SPACE has hit the headlines after allegedly pooing on a dog, in what has been described as a push back.
”It just rose up and did it,” the owner of the dog, identified locally as Mr Nugget, a Golden Labrador crossed with a Silver Whippet, told LCD Views, “Mr Nugget has been going to the toilet in this park since he was a puppy. If the park was so upset it could have just said something. I’m considering pressing charges and so is Mr Nugget.”
But the park, described as normally tranquil, if a little windy at times, hit back and released the following statement to the press.
”Enough is enough. Who’s the grass cutter now? Yeah? Punks. Go home and do it in a toilet.”
While the statement doesn’t exactly clear the park of the assault, it does display a degree of frustration that other green spaces were quick to respond to.
”Myself, Waltham Forest Green and Hyde Park have started a group on Facebook to show support with our relative. For too long dogs have shat on us at will. This stops now. We will no longer lay down and just take it. You can expect things to get a lot hillier now.”
It’s not clear at this stage if the police will be willing to bring charges and a statement from the local constabulary was not forthcoming, in spite of no effort to obtain one.
We asked our resident greenkeeper what he made of it, and why the green space has decided on a decidedly militant posture.
”It must be something in the water?” he suggested, which wasn’t really any help at all.
Mr Nugget is currently resting at home, but he will have to be walked again shortly, so it seems this may not be an isolated incident.