Titanic to sue HMS Elizabeth for Brexit related IP theft

Lawyers operating on behalf of the HMS Titanic have lodged court papers in order to sue the leaky aircraft carrier HMS Elizabeth for damages as a result of its (alleged) Brexit related IP theft.

“Our client, the Titanic, has clear ownership of Brexit related intellectual property and will be seeking damages in court from the HMS Elizabeth regardless of whether or not it ceases and desists its use as a Brexit metaphor.”

It’s believed the damages, if the Titanic is successful, could run to many millions, perhaps even billions.

The legal action immediately caught the eye of LBC shock jock and hate monger N. Farage who lambasted the HMS Elizabeth for clearly having been built by immigrant labour and not proper British shipbuilders.

He claims the fact the ship isn’t made from oak as evidence enough.

But the Titanic’s lawyers have sought to distance themselves from Mr. Farage’s comments, explaining, “our client maybe very, very annoyed, but it’s not a racist who hopes to profit off the economic calamity and isolation being caused by Brexit.”

Asked for comment, the HMS Elizabeth explained it will defend itself in court as an apt metaphor for Brexit and that as the Titanic sunk over a century ago all claims to metaphor exclusivity have expired with the usual statute copyright.

“Furthermore, I’m a bit of a joke internationally due to not having any planes. This is the last thing I need. I still don’t understand why they scrapped the other carriers before I was actually ready? Why?”

The department of defence is yet to comment on the developing shambles, other than to say it is attempting to plug the leak with the Brexit impact statements, which have been kindly supplied by Mr. David Davis somehow still an MP.

“It was a mistake to allow DExEU to draw up the plans to begin with,” a MOD whistleblower revealed, before returning to the pumps.

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