The crown prince of Saudi Arabia Mohammed bin Salman met with British Prime Minister Arlene Foster at 10 Downing Street earlier today to talk about how many bombs he would like to buy to continue peacekeeping efforts in Yemen.
”They also talked about religious fundamentalism,” our Downing Street correspondent reveals, “with the Saudi Prince gently encouraging Ms Foster to perhaps update her knowledge of when the world was made and how.”
Other issues covered were democratic reform, again the crown prince did his best to steer the British PM away from her traditional notions of how to conduct parliamentary democracy, to something more twenty first century.
Although neither could keep a straight face when the subject of blackmail came up.
Enquiries why Mohammed bin Salman choose to meet with Arlene Foster, and not her subordinate Theresa May, as initially scheduled, were met with a brisk reply.
”The Prince doesn’t waste his time making small talk with petty functionaries. He talks with the seat of power.”
It’s hoped the British trip will make the prince swoon and promise to bankroll Britain post Brexit, so long as we don’t quibble about all the death stuff.
The meeting followed an earlier breakfast with Queen Elizabeth II at Buckingham Palace.
Reports suggest the prince struggled to hide his disdain for the little “city crash pad” and its lack of a functioning execution block.
”How do you rule if you don’t chop off heads?” he is said to have asked in bemusement, but the Queen just smiled wistfully while Prince Charles muttered in a corner.
”It’s believed the Queen did ask the crown prince to convey a personal message to the British PM on her behalf.”
Which was?
”She is believed to have said ‘one has already gotten one’s EU flag hat out once, to make one’s views on Brexit plain,” our correspondent says, “one doesn’t expect to have to do it again’.”