A man who is always careful to be well tailored and manicured in his speech, lest the mask slip, has announced today he has bought a double breasted hi viz vest from a Saville Row tailor.
“One does not wish to appear to be an ordinary street thug while protesting against the sudden reemergence of parliamentary sovereignty,” the man told LCD Views’ Wolves in Wolves Clothing correspondent, “the men of my political persuasion of the 1920’s, 1930’s and early 1940’s were always well turned out. Latere aperto is my rule of thumb. But, and this is very cunning, sordidum opus face popular tuum, ut alii. It’s best if your common man does the pavement job of jostling and spitting at older people protesting peacefully. All in the innocent hope of intimidating them into silence.”
It’s believed once the vest has been tailored and a fitting taken place the man will wear it in the House of Commons to lend support to his own supporters on the pavements of Westminster.
“Parliament sits in the noble chamber of the House of Commons. Not on College Green. But on College Green the important work of explaining to common voters what happens if they protest against making good the illegally secured victory of the greatest act of democracy since Adolf had numerous referenda.”
Yes, thank you. And that’s with standing room only for the most important debates when a majority of elected representatives turn up, elbow to elbow.
Perhaps a new building would be order? So our MPs can all take a seat like adults and discuss things without carrying on like out of control boys sensing the blood of a substitute teacher. And maybe build it up north, to encourage love and sympathy for London?
“Oh, I do not think the great British public want us wasting their hard earned money willy nilly on new structures for parliament,” the man smirked, “once the shadowy backers of the yellow vests have their way, and I am elevated to the position of sovereign, their won’t even be a parliament.”
Brexit est Brexit.