YOUR NEXT PM ALREADY HATES YOU : The news wires are thrumming this morning with the news that Michael Gove is to meet privately with Rupert Murdoch’s deputy Donald Trump later today. But why?
“It’s a puzzle,” an aide to Michael Gove admitted to us, at a chance meeting in Hyde Park, “Donald Trump said yesterday he doesn’t know Michael Gove. Buggered if I know while they’ll be having a meeting. Trump is over here running errands for Murdoch, and some other well known billionaires, why he wants to see Gove is anyone’s guess.”
Don’t bullshit us. You know exactly why they’re meeting. As to the claim by Trump he doesn’t know Gove? That’s total nonsense. Gove interviewed him when Murdoch elevated Trump to regional manager back in late 2016.
“But I’m not supposed to say.”
Then let me guess and you nod or wink.
”Okay. But it’s pure speculation on your part.”
Everything we write is. So let’s have a swing at it. Is it so Trump can tell Gove who Murdoch has chosen to be the next British PM?
”Got it in one!”
You’re just supposed to nod or wink.
”Oh sorry. Nod.”
Don’t say it. Nod your head or wink.
”Wink then.”
Christ. Thanks for the insight.
”I hope it’s Gove. He’s been a very loyal foot soldier all these years. It’s time he was rewarded for all the hard work.”
What if Rupert has chosen Boris Johnson instead? That’ll burn.
”I don’t think anyone has chosen Boris. He’s just there for the laugh. Hero’s journey. But he won’t make it to the end. And even if he does, the most important thing is that the people believe they have decided who is the next PM.”
But they won’t have. It’ll be Murdoch who does, like always.
”But we’ll tell the people they have decided. The next PM will be their champion and will rail against the unelected elites in Brussels.”
But we just held elections for the EU parliament.
”What happens and what we tell you happened are often two different things. Funny old world, Rupert’s journalism, isn’t it? Just make sure whatever you see about the Tory leadership election on the front pages, that you believe it. All hail the king! The king is dead! And whoever is the next Tory leader, it’s what Rupert said.”