Didn’t work : National Grid explains power cut was UK being turned off and on again

READY FOR NO DEAL : The National Grid has shone light into the darkness of last night by explaining the reason behind the power cut which plunged swathes of England, and its regions, into the black.

”It was a trial run for No Deal Brexit,” the spokesman said, “and an attempt to see if we could stop diesel and remainers talking the country down by stopping them talking to one another.”

The spokesman went on to say the trial was judged to be a complete success.

”Nobody ate anyone. That’s pretty much the high watermark for wild success in terms of Brexit. Expect a festival to celebrate. And no one will eat anyone else in that too. Well, it’s unlikely to occur.”

But a leaked internal email, obtained by this fictional news media organisation from inside an imagined version of energy regulator Ofgem, says it was an entirely different reason altogether.

”They turned the country off an on again. England specifically, but the outage affected other regions too. It was an attempt to solve Brexit,” our energy analyst, Mrs High Beam, reveals, “I don’t suppose it worked. The country is still rebooting so we won’t know until later if it worked or not. I don’t think it worked. Did you think it worked? Is anything different? Are the criminal investigations into the electoral crimes of 2016 actually happening? Is Boris Johnson still Prime Minister? If he is it didn’t work.”

But you should not to be discouraged as the leaked email reveals the test will be tried again in a “live fire sandbox” at the end of October.

On the 31st the entire country will be switched off and on again.

”Let’s just pray the bigger test doesn’t coincide with a KFC shortage or we’re f*cked.” 

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