BREAKING : Millions of Remainer households secede to form federation called Exasperania

A NEW DAY HAS DAWNED : Debate is raging within the newly formed republic of Exasperania-Remainia today over whether or not to continue as a multi-mini state federation or revert to constitutional monarchy? And whether or not to ditch one of the names or keep both?

A source inside the Google hangout room, being used temporarily as the seat of government until a permanent capital can be built, had this to say,

“Some households are urging the use of an advisory referendum to decide the new republic’s government structure, but they have been rapidly identified as Russian bots and ejected. The feeling is that the Republic may become a constitutional monarchy on the condition of reverting back to a fully elected republic, after Queen Elizabeth II has finished her time on the throne. Until then it is seen as sensible to offer her a sane, evidenced based harbour.”

But minor matters regarding constitutional arrangements aside, the newly formed Republic of Remainia-Exasperania has already been admitted to the EU’s membership accession programme and looks set to become full members by the 13th December 2019.

We spoke to head of the diplomatic corp, Mr Evidence, to hear how it’s going?

“Fantastic. We’ve agreed to adopt the Euro, Schengen (it’ll operate entirely by airplane) and to pay the full membership fee as part of a fully signed up, multi-mini state federation belonging to the EU. I expect to become a millionaire in whatever currency you like trading in toilet paper to UK residents on my border after the UK crashes out of the EU.”

But will you still vote in the GE?

“Clearly we cant. We’re fine with that. We’ll just watch now and laugh and cry simultaneously.”

There are rumours that Boris Johnson is urging the MOD to take Remainia back into the UK by force, but that the MOD is unable to comply, due to Conservative government defence cuts.

And the Labour leadership is said to be sanguine.

“We can Just campaign fully for Lexit now. No more pretending we give a shit about Remainers, just because we need their votes. It’s great. We couldn’t be happier.”

LCD Views would like to wish the new republic good luck, but urge them to remain vigilant, as we’ve already heard reports of Michael Gove and Boris Johnson attempting to smuggle themselves over one of the many millions of new borders created today, hoping to escape from the giant mess they accidentally created.

Take back control of your borders Remainia-Exasperania and keep control.

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