Downing Street to replace EU’s outward looking ‘Erasmus’ scheme with UK’s own ‘Anuss’

LOWER EDUCATION LOWER, LOWER, KEEP GOING : 10 Downing Street has reacted to the libtard, snowflake moaning over the potential loss of UK students involvement in Erasmus by announcing it is replacing the dangerous scheme of international collaboration with a UK only one.

“Seriously, people are much more upset over Harry supporting Meghan in deciding to live a life away from the racist bile of British tabloid columnists than they are over their own government voting to shaft child refugees, where stunned anyone noticed our stepping away quietly from Erasmus. Bit of a blind side that.”

But while the vote in the House of Commons to block Layla Moran’s suggestion the government should prioritise international exchange of students is not in itself a surprise, the decision to act swiftly and replace Erasmus with a UK only scheme is.

“Anuss will benefit true born British people and especially native Inglanders,” the spokesman revealed, “Anuss stands for Awful Nationalism Used Stupidly Syndrome and we’ve spent a lot more time gazing at it than most are willing to realise.”

While participation in UKGov’s Anuss will initially be voluntary, it is hoped to swiftly bring in legislation to force all students to participate.

“We want them to really get their heads stuck into it,” the spokesman grinned, “smell it, taste it, feel it. It’s a fitting symbol of the new world we can create thanks to Brexit. Just shove your noggin into Anuss and keep it there.”

But what about students who still wish to participate in Erasmus?

“That’s straightforward and will be covered in the legislation we’re bringing forward for parliament to rubber stamp,” the source replied, “if their daddy is a wealthy Brexit backer whose bought them a burgundy passport for an EU27 state, off you go son, enjoy yourself. If they’re a poor person we’ll be charging them with treason. We call it levelling up higher education to create the Britain we want to govern. Educated, entitled rich people ruling over barely literate plebs. Perfect.”

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *