Downing Street to replace 2024 GE with alogorithm based on 2019 election

LOVELY DEMOCRACY YOU’VE GOT THERE BE A SHAME IF SOMETHING WERE TO HAPPEN TO IT : Downing Street is expected to confirm later today significant changes to the UK’s electoral system, to make it less vulnerable to foreign interference.

LCD Views has long argued for reform of the outdated system used by Westminster and is pleased to see our campaign has been successful.

Later today the chair of the newly created SCAT Task Force (Systematic Crumbling of Accountability Taskforce) is pencilled in to give a speech to outline the changes.

“We welcome this move,” our political analyst comments, “as you know LCD Views has long campaigned to make our electoral system more secure and less vulnerable to outside interference. The people need certainty, and from what I’ve seen of the speech SCAT’s No 1 will give, this will provide.”

In essence the new electoral system will mean people do not have to take a day off work in order to vote. And it’s not because the polling day is being moved to the weekend.

“They’re going to use an algorithm, which apparently is named after a famous American politician’s dancing method,” our analyst informs (don’t we always), “but it’s based on the world beating one premiered for use in 2020 A level grading. This caught everyone’s attention.”

But how will this new algorithmic voting system relieve UK voters of the burden of voting?

“Because the result will now be based on the 2019 general election. The government will thus have its result upgraded, Labour be lucky to hit three figures and the Libdems, Greens, Plaid, Independents and SNP vanish from the political landscape. It’ll make governing for Johnson a lot easier, whether or not he’s on holiday. That will become irrelevant.”

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