ERG approve Johnson’s deal after he reassures them he has no intention of honouring it

WOULD YOU BUY A USED CAR FROM THIS MAN : THOSE STALWART MEN AND WOMEN WHO KNOW NUFFINK ABOUT EUROPE, THE ERG, HAVE BACKED JOHNSON’S DEAL.

The support of the ERG was confirmed today after a meeting of their Starfish Chamber.

It will be a great relief for the British prime minister who is currently somewhere, doing something with someone, and wouldn’t have wanted to break up his extended seasonal jollies prematurely.

With the support of the ERG in place parliament can reconvene happy tomorrow in voting for a foregone conclusion. Not that what they think about the deal matters.

But some are surprised by the ERG’s support for a deal that effectively breaks the U.K. into three different customs zones. How does that square with the desperate attempt to be as sovereign as a man who decided he wanted to start screwing around on the missus, but still get to screw her too?

“Classic Johnson,” an ERG spokesman told LCD Views, while attending a ceremony to drown a bag of puppies. “We’re well up for it. Now we can continue to take taxpayer money and spend it on puppies. And not on researching Europe.”

Good news indeed.

“And besides, we got the best reassurance we possibly could out of the prime minister. He asked us to consider his record and had he ever honoured any agreement once he’d put his name to it?”

No research group required to answer that one!

“Indeed! It’s easy to support him over this deal to get us out of the EU, as he has no intention of honouring it. Which is why none of us need bother ourselves with understanding what’s in it!”

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