Chairman May’s single thought on Brexit to be written into UK law

Exciting news for defenders of democracy this morning with the revelation that the EU Withdrawal Bill will write Chairman May’s thought on Brexit into UK law.

LCD Views spoke to our Democracy is Possible correspondent to discover more.
“Brexit means Brexit,” Ms S Ham proudly revealed. “That is our great leader’s biggest thought on Brexit.”

It’s believed it was a close run thing with red, white and blue Brexit also a contender for immortalising into the constitution we kinda have and kinda don’t.

“There will be a ceremony after the successful vote on the bill and Ms May will personally chisel her famous thought into a granite slab that will stand alongside Winston Churchill on Westminster Green.

“There’s even rumours that a hologram will be projected onto the sculpture of Winston’s face with footage of the great leader’s lips perpetually repeating the deep thought, but only until a bronze of Theresa May can be cast to replace the old bulldog.”

As to what May thinks English characteristics are, we had to request our correspondent dig back through transcripts of previous speeches and actions to see what May thinks.

“Flexibility and imagination is mentioned a lot during her reign. Generosity with food is huge. Look at all the food banks that have opened during her time. So the classic, queuing is there too. Oh, and a breezy use of xenophobia for cheap short term political gain. That’s probably the biggest.”

Labour is said to be pushing for an amendment however which will force the government to leave space for a photo of Jeremy Corbyn at Glastonbury to go on too, if and when he becomes Chairman Jezza.

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