Great news for lovers of patriotic songs today with the announcement from the Ministry for Potatoes that their crop of Tory MP’s will be introducing a new bill in parliament that will make it obligatory for every other British leg to play “God Save The Queen” when pulled after Brexit.
“We actually wanted to make the law retrospective,” said Tumble-Trot Bum-aster, MP for Trot-Bum-on-Creem, “but we were sabotaged by some remaoner civil servants who were determined we do not break the laws of time and travel backwards any further than we already are.
And to be fair, given the result of the last vote ever needed by the United Kingdom, it seems legs are pretty easy to pull already, we just have to theme tune them.”
Also, an upside of the advice is that all true born British children will have the opportunity to learn the lyrics of the famous music hall classic in time for 10pm 29th March 2019.
“Some children have been caught singing ‘God save the EU’, which will of course be a hanging offence from 22:01, 29th March 2019.”
Further preparations will be undertaken to help right thinking British folk choose which leg is their preferred leg to be pulled.
“If you don’t use your good leg you might make a hash of the song,” Tumble-Trot says soberly,
“I use my gentleman’s personal gentleman’s leg for all songs, as a rule, so even I have to work out which leg I’m going to have pulled to play ‘God Save The Queen’.
As an MP I tend to pull my middle leg in the office.”
At this point the MP appeared to notice he was already pulling his leg and not singing.
“Excuse me. I appear to need to sing, to lead the charge, you don’t know the lyrics to ‘God Save The Queen’ do you?”
We don’t. Oh my God.
“Australian sons let us rejoice for we” No! Stop.
“Oh say, can you see the dawn’s early light” No!
”The people’s flag is deepest red”
No! Only if Labour get into power and are determined to turn Brexit into Lexit!
The lyrics will have to be learned by the time the neocon project of Brexit reaches tumescent fulfilment in 2029.
Anyone have ‘Alexa’ handy? She’ll know. We are on the wrong path but at least we’ve seen the light.
God save our gracious Queen (from the Brexiters once they get Henry VIII powers) and the rest of us…
Pull the other one, it plays Brexit bells.