FREE SPEECH CHAMPIGNON : Britain knows what to censor and when to censor it and no one in Britain knows better than the Secretary of State for Education Gavin Williamson.
And as the UK moves into the future, post Brexit, it needs to ensure that people have not just the right words to speak, but the right thoughts too. Which is why Mr Williamson is getting tough with those hotbeds of wrong thought, the universities.
“We were able to deal with the issue of freedom of speech in primary schools easily enough,” an aide to the Education Supremo told LCD Views. “The only history you’re free to speak is history that makes the UK look good. This is what freedom to speak is about, it’s the freedom to speak what you’re allowed to. It’s like any other freedom, it has limits. Like a speed limit. Young children will talk properly when they grow up now because they only learn about WW1 and WW2 and they learn it relentlessly. But universities are a trickier customer. Happily Gavin is up to the task.”
And to prove where he is at with those that would undermine the glorious future of post Brexit UK Mr Williamson is getting those scruffy hippy students by the scruff.
“He’s starting off with banning songs that undermine the underlying political philosophy of Brexit. Brexit is inherently fascist. That means fascism is now good. Just look at our pandemic management if you doubt it? See those DNR orders go on all those files. And universities are the next battleground.”
There will be a list of songs that it is okay to sing, but there is one song that is definitely out.
“Hitler Has Only Got One Ball can no longer legally be sung. Because if we’re going to replay the 1930’s thanks to Brexit, as we are determined to, you’ve got to know which side we’re now on.”