Jeremy Hunt maybe forced to deny rumours that the murky figures hold a “kompromat” tape of him giving blood.
The tape, believed to be recorded nearly ten years ago, is said to be a little out of focus, but it is claimed Mr Hunt is potentially identifiable sat in a chair donating.
“He’ll be out of a job if it’s true,” an aide inside the PM’s office hypothesised.
“It’s a clear breach of party membership rules. Well, she’ll beg him to resign. What he does is up to him ultimately, of course, May governs by consent. She’s very modern in that way.”
If proven it will also be a glaring dereliction of duty, however retrospect, for a true blooded Tory health minister charged with piecemeal sale of the NHS.
It’s not clear what the holders of the tape could be demanding in order to keep it in its box and off the internet, but it’s almost certainly linked to privatisation of the NHS.
“It’s a murky web,” LCD’s security correspondent Heather Mills commented.
“I suggest follow the money. You link a private contractor in the NHS to a firm in which Trump has an interest and that will take you back to the source. It’ll be all about money at the end of the day. It always is.”
In the interim NHS blood bank staff are warned to be on the watch for anyone lingering near to a fridge, as it’s thought however long ago the mishap was, the health secretary won’t rest until he gets every last drop of the accidental donation back. If it happened of course…