Newly formed ‘Kent Independence Party’ chooses a parked lorry as symbol

THE GRAND OLD KING OF THANET : Nigel Farage is in denial mode this morning after his latest political party set its sights on just the borders of Kent.

“NO, NO, let me speak,” Mr Farage told a pursed lipped Andrew Marr, as surprisingly, the BBC gave him a platform for his latest crusade.

“There is no suggestion, none whatsoever that Russian, or American money, is bankrolling my mission to free the good people of Kent from the tyrannical rule of the unelected bureaucrat in Downing Street. Ordinary Kent oligarchs are donating money to the cause in multiples of £25 thousands of individual times. This is a people’s revolution.”

And the formation of the Kent Independence Party is said to have taken Westminster by surprise, but is not seen as a serious threat to the integrity of the UK’s internal market.

“We didn’t see it coming,” a superforecaster said, “but then, we don’t see anything coming. We’re too busy telling ourselves about our own genius.”

But what slogan Mr Farage will choose to spearhead his latest battle to free his chosen people isn’t yet clear.

“Make Kent Great Again,” Mr Farage told Marr, “that’s not a slogan. It’s a divine mission. For too long the patriotic people of Kent have been held to ransom by Downing Street while thousands of illegal refugees flood our borders from Sussex. I am not even calling for a referendum this time, just the immediate and complete independence of Kent. Our capital will be Thanet. And we will be shortly issuing our own coins with myself, humbly, agreeing to the people’s demands to be the figurehead.”

Look out for the flags of the Kent Independence Movement being raised around the newly built lorry parks as Mr Farage strives for relevance.

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