Episode 1: The Fellowship of the Wrong
The story begins in a hole. A big, deep, dark hole. And in the hole dwelt a bad Habbit named Nigel Faragollum. His mind was completely enslaved by his Magic Wrong.
The Wrong did not belong to Faragollum. It was the property of the dark lord Sauwrong, but it had been lost for years. Many believed that it would lie buried forever.
However the Wrong was found and taken underground by Faragollum. It was discovered in bizarre fashion by another Habbit, presented to the civilised Shires, and made respectable.
In time, though, minds became poisoned. Faragollum emerged to recover the Wrong. Sauwrong sent his chief lieutenant, the deadly Witch-King Dacre, to retrieve it.
Willbo, of the People of the Shires, was entrusted with the Wrong. He set off, pursued by the phantoms of xenophobia and sovereignty, to get beyond the Mounting Mistakes.
Accompanied by a motley band of wizards, dwarves and other mythical figures, Willbo managed to pass through the Mounting Mistakes. Unfortunately, he lost his most ardent supporter, who fell into a chasm of his own making.
Willbo was also pursued by trolls, unintelligent troglodytes parroting inane slogans. Unexpected relief came when the Lady Theresa and her ineffective husband gave the Wrong a break. Willbo emerged refreshed, and the Lady distributed gifts worth £10bn.
He then had to take the Wrong up the river without a paddle.
Faragollum followed Willbo wherever he went, desperately trying to recover his precious Wrong, but without success.
Eventually, and at his wits’ end, Willbo decided to do the right thing. He abandoned his illusory friends, and set off to destroy the Great Wrong with which he had been entrusted.
We remember the words of the prophet Camewrong echoing down the ages:
One vote to rule them all, one vote to bind them
One vote to bring them all and in the darkness bind them
In the land of Westminster where the ministers lie.
Episode Two: The Two Powers to follow…