Theresa May refuses to say if she would vote for Theresa May in general election

“I only have one vote to cast in any ballot and I must be careful to get it right,” Theresa May told LCD Views during a snap poll about voting intentions,

“I’m not sure I could vote for Theresa May, given her track record, in all honesty. Neither will I rule it out. Voting means voting.”

Theresa May wasn’t alone in her indecision, although with a general election in the United Kingdom not due for many years, she probably has time to decide.

“What colour Brexit she finally delivers will be key to my decision. Beige? Elephant tusk? Scat Brown? Mildew pink? Or a classic red, white and blue?”

Theresa May’s response is indicative of the answers given in our snap poll.

“I’m not voting for her,” a man, B Johnson answered, “I’m writing my name on the ballot. It’s what I’ve always done. It’s what I’ll always do.”

But there was support for Theresa May from surprising quarters.

We interviewed a couple enjoying a bag of crisps together while a pack of blue collared, feral dogs fought in the gutter for their entertainment.

“I’m behind her one hundred percent,” the woman, who gave her name as Nicola S, replied.

“Same here,” said her friend, JC.

We asked why, as neither looked like traditional Tory voters.

“She’s doing our work for us,” they said in unison, before turning to each other and saying “snap!”

“Another year of her government and everything I’ve always wanted will come true.”

We stayed a while with them, watching the pack fight.

“I’m not voting for her,” a chap muttered behind us, while the dogs tore strips out of each other, “she’s just some kind of bigoted woman.”

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