A woman previously noted for being a wellspring of compassion is facing tough questions today after being caught flogging a dying horse.
The horse in question appears to change its coat depending on which perspective you look at it, but it’s definitely, currently, on its last legs.
“Shortly after midday today a middle aged lady who is regarded publicly as a bleeding heart, especially for people in need whatever their background, was caught on camera flogging a dying horse,” a spokesman for the RSPPCA told LCD.
It appears the horse in question has had numerous owners throughout its long life.
“Parliamentary democracy is a name an earlier owner called the horse. It’s also being called Truth, Fact, Evidence based assertions, Accountability and Select committees, just to list a few names.”
Strong and Stable was another handle given to the ailing steed, but this was exceptionally short lived.
“She has form in this regard too,” the spokesman continued, “She is rumoured to have completely and totally flogged to death another widely known horse called Labour’s record in government. This horse was so old by the time it felt the whip, that it expired upon feeling the whip.”
Although it should be noted, for the purposes of balance worthy of the Beeb, that political opponents of the woman in question are known to deviate now and then from their central task of finding out if the woman is up to anything untoward, to lash out at What Nick Clegg did, even though, what Tony Blair did a few years earlier makes eternal damnation of the former’s political party hypocritical.
“We trust this woman will be stopped before she can inflict greater harm on Parliamentary democracy. While not the only specimen on the planet, it’s the only example of it in the United Kingdom and it will be preferable to stop her beating it before it dies.”
If she’s stopped it’s likely a fresh horse called The Tories record in government will start to feel the whip, and it will take some beating.