Overly sensitive Tory MPs to cover Pink Floyd classic “Comfortably Numb” retitled “Comfortably Dumb”

Great news for lovers of classic songs today with the announcement that a group of the sharpest tacks in an otherwise blunt Tory box have formed a musical troupe in order to cover Pink Floyd’s classic song ‘Comfortably Numb’.

The group, calling themselves ‘The Spoons’ may not be easily trusted with a knife and fork, but LCD Views’ musical correspondent is certain they can do justice to one of the stand out classics of British music.

“Especially as they’re going to re-title the song ‘Comfortably Dumb’,” our very own music man says, “but that’s not due to some burst of self-awareness, it’s because that’s what they think the song is called.”

The tune, once committed to vinyl, will be released free in boxes at food banks in the areas represented by the MPs.

“It’s thought that seeing their mugs on the jacket of the single will give people using the food banks a lift. Many of them may right then be seeking a new cover for a dart board, as well as a square meal.”

But the artistic foray isn’t without criticism, as some leading dims in the ranks of the government aren’t in the group.

“Chris Grayling was supposed to be there, but he was busy trying to pull open a door that has push written on it. It’s believed that will keep him tied up for weeks. And Jacob Rees-mogg agreed to take part, so long as he could sing his lines in pig latin, but then he had to pull out because his nanny is taking him to be weighed at the doctors that day.”

Nonetheless, we’re sure the group can make a success of the single and we fully expect not one penny of the post production sale profits to go to charity.

“The opening lines of the song are particularly pertinent to the group of MPs,

Hello?
Is there anybody in there?
Just nod if you can hear me
Is there anyone at home?

That’s exactly what anyone meeting Raab, Dorries, Bridgen, Davis and so on routinely ask when hearing them say anything at all and looking in their eyes.”

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