PAPER OVER THE CRACKS : The much mentioned (on the UK side) special relationship between the USA and the UK is expected to deepen with the change in administration at 10 Downing Street.
“Mr Johnson is even going to create a new ministry specifically to manage the relationship between himself and Mr Trump,” an aide to the Johnson camp told LCD Views, “The Ministry for Giving Offence will be massive. Bright. Red. Visible from space massive.”
The thinking behind the creation of the new ministry is thought to be an attempt to find a way to better coordinate the use of racist dog whistling in politics between the Trump administration and the Johnson one.
“We don’t want it to appear too coordinated,” the aide explained, “if Trump is having an Islamophobic outburst, then Boris will need to be attacking the French, and vice versa. We have to be sure to get good coverage of all targets to make a success of the project.”
But in many ways the relationship will continue to function as it did under Ms May, only this time the British prime minister won’t be expected to give a pretence to difference, but rather the opposite.
“Boris will be sat squarely behind Trump’s inflamed rear eagerly cupping whatever it produces, before smearing it across the UK and Europe. It’s going to be great, so, so great. Not many people know this, but the UK is going to have an even deeper special relationship with the USA now. Just the biggest special relationship. So special it will need its own measures.”