Government policy replaced by Leave.EU propaganda

The government of national disunity has become the political wing of Leave.EU. Bereft of any real ideas or policies, it has substituted recycled propaganda.

This is why Boris Johnson is insisting that he’s going to do a great deal with the EU. Expect him to assert that we hold all the cards.

Expect him to deny that, with hindsight, that these cards are a joker, a business card from Dawdle, Ripov & Scarper estate agents, and Mr Bun the baker.

Expect him to say that these are brand new cards, and not the old cards covered with childish graffiti.

Expect him to tell you that post-Brexit Britain will be like an unsubtle variation of ‘sunlit uplands’. Sunny Highlands or something. Expect him to feign surprise when the country says ‘Bollocks!’

Expect an emphasis on blame. Britain’s Brexit policy and subsequent failure is already the fault of the EU, and, oddly, Ireland. Everyone’s fault but mine is the line. Pig farmers, global warming, negative thinking. Expect it to be all your own fault. Expect Britain to point the finger straight back.

Expect blatant racism. Swarms and hordes of vermin swamping the country. Reds under the bed. Any opponents of the Brexit faith denounced as traitors, saboteurs, enemies. Yada yada yada. Expect Boris to falter and corpse as even he can’t believe he’s saying it.

Expect pots to call the kettles black. Wait for unelected bureaucrat Dominic Cummings to call properly elected EU representatives unelected bureaucrats. Expect even the Daily Telegraph to start questioning this approach. Expect the country to laugh at Cummings and make crude puns on his name.

Expect Nigel Farage to come steaming in to denounce all and sundry, and say that he, and only he, is the true Keeper of the Flame of Brexit. Expect him to talk big but offer no practical advice. Expect him to offer to take over as PM, accountable only to himself. Expect him to slink away when nobody listens to him this time.

Expect Brexit to be cancelled instead of delayed this time.

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